“Change is inevitable growth is optional”. ~Rick

Ever just hit "the zone"? I may have this week. I managed to dodge my normal doc for 9 (NINE!!!!) days last week, saw her once in passing, but did not have to work with her or get yelled at by her.

I think that something changed in me during that week, or perhaps it was this weekend. I dont know for sure. What I do know is that I reached a new level of not caring about her at all. But the cool thing is that there is such freedom in that. Freedom in a good way. I did not think that I was trying to show her that I was a good student, that I was not a slacker that does not know anything, but perhaps I was. The change is that I just dont care now, but its such a freaking cool thing. I was walking down the hall of the hospital this week and I had a scrubs moment, I saw spine doc walking down the hall, he saw me and we did the walk by high five. Not really sure why we would do that, but hey it happened . I got to do a late trauma pelvic fracture tonight and just got out of it a moment ago. I got a "Wow Matt, that was the funniest thing you have said during your whole rotation with us" from normal surgeon. What did I say you might ask?:

Surgeon: "No, the report says that there is a foreign body in the medial thigh, but they are stupid, its just bone."
PA-S: "Well, cant bone be a foreign body?"
Surgeon: "NO, NO, NO. Bone is NEVER a foreign body."
PA-S: "Well, what if the guy is from France?"

So I guess I am just loosening up and being much more myself, I just like being me and dont like being put in situations that dont let me be me. I dont know why I was hiding it so much but I was. Probably because I was trying so hard to remember all the anatomy of whatever I was working on. Ya, perhaps. But that does not mean I like working for 18 hours a day.

Surgery can still suck it.