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Sunday, August 28, 2005

Morning

Most amazingly spectacular morning ever.

This is the first Saturday night that I have slept at my new phillomath house, in all the time that I have lived here, I have always been up in Mac, or Portland to wake up on Sunday morning. Little did I know going to sleep last night that when I woke up I would have a gift waiting for me. I stopped at Wen-co last night on my way home to pick up some coffee for this morning, I knew that I would wake up and be hungry and want some coffee, having nothing ready for the morning ritual of eating and drinking, I got some coffee from the bulk bins, and headed over to the bakery, ya, I was looking for some doughnuts. Some how I have gotten hooked into thinking that I need doughnuts and coffee in the morning, usually it is just a treat that I let myself have every once in a while, usually I am in Mac, so I stop by the Doughnut Kettle, ponder life over a couple cups of coffee and a nice maple bar, or chocolate covered buttermilk bar, I really think well there, somehow it has become a sort of spiritual portal for me, I feel connected or in touch and able to think clearly.

Recently the DK has changed ownership and the new people are trying to cut costs, so the last time that I was there, they did not have the same coffee from the local micro roster, and the doughnuts were just barely covered with the chocolaty goodness that is the frosting or whatever you want to call it. Now it was simply a bad tasting cake thing with a thin film of the excessively sugary topping. I guess that I am a little picky, but if I am going to eat a fat pill (doughnut) I want to eat something that tastes really really good, what’s the point of eating a bad tasting thing that’s bad for you? How does this relate to my morning now? You shall see. This actually had an effect on my descision making process about should I stay at my parents house in Mac or come back to P-math home, and tipped the scale in favor of heading back to P-math.

So back to Whin-co, the doughnut situation was really sad, so I checked out the bagel situation, which was not much better, but I did find that there were some chocolate chip bagels, so I was like humm, that might work. So I got the bagels and my coffee and headed home.

I get up this morning a little excited to try my new coffee flavor and the bagels. I get up wander out to the kitchen, start the coffee, start the clothes dryer (I had set a load to dry before I went to bed last night, it had my morning sweater in it, the one that I usually just have somewhere near my bed on the floor that I can put on in the morning with sweat pants and be nice and comfortable). Than its back to bed for 10 min or so, the mornings out here are starting to get almost cold, as in its not summer and 90 degrees when you get up in the morning. So I get back out of bed, put on some nice warm sweat pants, go out to the kitchen, get a cup of really good coffee (French vanilla I think) put my CC bagel in the toaster, and am just happy with how things are going, than my bagel is done, I get it out, and put some nutella on it and man is it good, than I remember my sweater warming in the dryer, so I go grab that put it on, get my cup-o-jo, and get out on my back deck, this is when I start to realize that this in no ordinary morning.

I am on my back deck, it’s a little cold outside, I can see the steam rising off my coffee, and my breath is condensing the water molecules in the air (I can see my breath), I have an amazingly good bagel with nutella on it (better than any doughnut that I have ever eaten) I have amazing good coffee that I am just thrilled about, and am wrapped in a warm sweater that I just pulled from the dryer. I am just thrilled at everything as all these good things happen, and I get to sit on my back deck and watch the sun rise behind the hill, I am happy, really happy. I am having a hard time putting into words all the joy and happiness that I feel going on inside of me. I am just thrilled to be alive.

Than I realize that I am not as happy as I could be. I am a somewhat social person; no joy is fully realized (in my mind) until I can share it with someone else. I have no one else to share this with, my rommie is gone for the weekend, and there is no one that can experience this amazing thing with. I can tell you about how amazingly good it felt to be standing outside in the cold, but almost sweating for the warmth from the sweater. Or how the texture of the bagel and nutella just seemed to fill every part of my mouth, but sadly, none of you are here, you don’t get to feel it. I was really bummed, I felt alone and sad.

In the midst of my sorrow, I had an odd thought, “ya know what, gods out here”. How cool if I could share it with him. So I did, I sat out on the back deck and sang, ate, drank, and felt so grateful that I could share this amazing moment with someone. He did not have too much to say about the bagels, and left all the coffee for me, but it was a cool feeling.

So props to god, for throwing a grand morning, and I think you all should try cc bagels and nutella, its some good stuff.

M@
"Live Free Or Die; Death Is Not The Worst of Evils." ~ General John Stark,
July 31, 1809

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